Attack of the Phone
by Flower Gal Aeris
Summary: Aeris' phone goes psycho, and it won't DIE. Sephy comes over. They team up against the newfound evil. Will the phone prevail and end the world as we know it? Or am I losing my mind?


"DAMMIT! Would you shut up already!!" "*Bee-eep*" "ARRGH!!!"

Attack Of The Phone!!

By: Aeris

*Based on a True Story!!!*

(It's a nice Friday in the Midgar slums. Aeris is sitting casually on her bed, listening to music and reading some Fanfics.)

Aeris: (laughing) "This one is soo damn funny!!"

(Suddenly, the peacefulness is broken, when a long, monotonous beep rings through the room.)

*Beeeeeeeeee-eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*

Aeris: (??) "The hell?" (looks around) "What is that?" (looks at the phone, sitting on her stereo) "What the hell is your problem?" (walks to it and picks it up)

Phone: (Keeps beeping)

Aeris: ( o.O; ) "Um can you please be quiet? I'm reading."

Phone: (Still beeps)

Aeris: () " don't make me step on you!"

Phone: (Keeps on beeping)

Aeris: (.;) "That's it!" (throws the phone on the floor) Hah! That oughta show ya!"

Phone: (Beeps still)

Aeris: ( ? O.o; ) "DAMMIT!! I said(stomps on it) SHUT (stomps on it again) UP!!!"

Phone: (Still beeping)

Aeris: "Grrr.. that's it! I'm gonna call Sephy and have him slice you up!!" (thinks..) "Oh wait that's my only phone!! DAMMIT! I can't call him!!"

(doorbell rings)

Aeris: (??) (goes to answer it, and Seph is there) "Hey, good timing! I need your help!"

Seph: "Why, whats going on?"

Aeris: (takes his hand, and leads him into her room) "You'll see."

Phone: (beeping)

Seph: () "It's a phone."

Aeris: "I know, it won't stop beeping!"

Seph: "Did you think maybe you have a call?"

Aeris: "Hm" (presses the talk' button, and nothing happens. But the phone is *still* beeping..) "Nope, that's not it."

Seph: (thinks for a moment) "Huh.. maybe it just needs a good banging. Let me see it."

Aeris: (handing him the phone) "Have fun."

Seph: (examines it, then bangs it against the wall *really* hard, making a crack in the wall)

Phone: (*still* beeping)

Aeris: (sweatdrop)

Seph: (casts Ice3 on it) ""

(the ice doesn't do a thing to the phone, and it still beeps)

Aeris: (shivering) "That just made the room cold!"

Seph: "Oops. Sorry." (wraps his arm around her) "Better?"

Aeris: (nods)

Seph: (throws the phone on the floor)

Phone: (beeping still)

Aeris: "Ugh is this thing possesed or something?"

Seph: "Dunno. What else can we do?"

Aeris: (stomps on the phone *really* hard, and the battery cover pops off) "Hm what's that?"

Seph: (looks down) "those are batteries. But they're the kind that are wired into the phone."

Aeris: (snaps her fingers) "I got it! Let's snip the wires!"

Seph: "Then the phone will be ruined."

Aeris: (thinking) "True but we have $9 million. We can afford another one, right?"

Seph: "..good point." (takes out the Masamune)

Aeris: (jumps back) "EEP! Keep that thing away!"

Seph: (looks) "Oh yeah sorry. Got any scissors?"

Aeris: "No. but I have a couple cherry bombs! Let's just blow it up!"

Seph: "Ok then." (puts the Masamune away, much to Aeris' relief, who goes back over to him)

Aeris: (holding up the cherry bombs and the phone) "Let's go outside then."

(they walk outside, and away from the flowers, and Seph ties the cherry bombs to the phone.)

Seph: (patting his pockets) " got a match?"

Aeris: (patting hers) ".. no. Um use your materia! It's just as good!"

Seph: (nods, and casts Fire on the wicks) "RUN!" (grabs Aeris around the waist, and runs like hell)

(the phone blows up into a million pieces, and stops beeping)

Aeris: "Booyaka!!! We did it!!! Woo-hoo!!!"

Seph: "*Booyaka?* Where did that come from?"

Aeris: "Got it from Selphie."

Seph: "Oh. Well, in any case, we killed the phone."

Aeris: (smiles, and kisses him) "Yeah. Thanks for your help, Sephy!"

Seph: (smiles) "No problem. Mind if I stick around for a while?"

Aeris: (winks) "Not at all, love." 

(they are about to walk back into the house, when a tiny microchip lands in front of them)

M.C.: *Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*

Seph and Aeris: (sweatdrop)

*~END~*

Please R/R! ^-^ ~Aeris-mun


End file.
